Monthly Archives: October 2018

The Not-Good-Enough Syndrome

Well there I go again.

Comparing.  And coming out on the short end of the stick.  My heart beats fast.  My palms sweat.  Tears well up in my eyes.  I can physically feel my shoulders drop and posture slump.  I’m just not good enough.

I’m not good enough to be rooming with all of these smart girls at my conference.
I’m not smart enough to be on this committee.
I’m not as good of a writer, speaker, mom, wife, friend or christian as those people.

And snap!  The devil has lured me to his little mouse trap and I took the bait.  We all take the bait now and then I believe.  Social media encourages it.

“Only post the good, happy moments”.
“Take seventeen different angles of the photo so I don’t look so heavy.”
“Get this side so that my 3-carat diamond shows.”
“Hold on. Let me cut out this part of the video so that people don’t know I screwed up.”

And on and on it goes.  I was so excited about an event I’m getting ready to attend, exchanging messages with my newfound friends, deciding what we will eat and who will sleep where.  Then I flip over to write my blog and social media attacks me with ideas of insecurity and low self-worth.

Well, devil, I’ve had enough of the not-good-enough syndrome.  God wants me to be there.  God called me to do what He called me to do and no matter what you say, do or show me on my Facebook feed will change who I am in Christ.

Good enough? Not by social media standards.

Delete.  Delete. Delete.  There now.  I don’t have to think I’m good enough because I know the One who says I am.

What’s Your Volleyball’s Name?

Who remembers Tom Hanks on an uninhabited island talking to his best friend, Wilson, after his plane crashes?

What was Wilson?

A volleyball.  Yes. A volleyball.

Tom turned this leather item into a companion, made a face on it and it became his go-to during the lonely times.  He started to believe this volleyball was a real person and would turn to Wilson for advice as if the volleyball had become his counselor.

Of course, the Cast Away movie ends with a remarkable rescue and Tom returns to civilization with a new-found love for life.

Although the details of the movie and the writer’s rendition of survival may be a little dramatic, I think we can all identify with the feelings of isolation and the long, overdue need for rescue.

We get caught up in doing things our own way instead of listening to God.  We get caught up in the world, the politics, the greed, the social media wars and the negativity.  We get caught up in our sin and we feel like we have to hide; as if we are all alone on this deserted island.  A cast away.

We start believing no one will understand.  So we find our counselor in things.  We talk to Amazon Prime and order more shoes.  We turn our woes to bottles or prescriptions.  We paint a face on smut and television shows.  And before we know it, we have created our own “Wilson” and we are in desperate need of a rescue.

Jesus is the lifeboat.  He has been floating around us the whole time just waiting for us to recognize the bright light.  All we have to do is put up the flare and He will pull us back to safety.

Are you feeling like a cast away?  Have you turned to your own “Wilson” for help instead of reaching to the Lord?  It’s not too late.  You’re never too far out to sea to reach up and grab His hand.  Let Him rescue you. Because life on the inland with Jesus is much better than tossing out in the sea with Satan.  So long, Wilson!

Oh Yes. I Remember.

I was driving to work in the early morning hours; sun starting to peek through the clouds; fog blurring my path and settling over the ponds.  Headlights on bright as I leisurely drove the back roads solo; not a single car in sight.  Lauren Daigle’s voice keeping me company.
My mind was racing with the to-do list of the day; worries from yesterday; anxiety for tomorrow.

And then my new favorite song shuffled through my phone.

REMEMBER.

It was exactly what I needed to calm the waves of anxiousness and worry.

“I remember, I remember
You have always been faithful to me
I remember, I remember
Even when my own eyes could not see
You were there, always there”

He has always been with me.  He has always been faithful.  Somehow in the clutter in my mind, I had forgotten.  But in the stillness of the morning, sunrise on the horizon, I remembered.

And peace.  Yes peace.

As He helped me remember.

Choose The Winning Team!

“It’s time to pick teams,” shouts the PE teacher as he designates the captains.

Of course each captain wants the athletic, tall, strong students.  One by one the students are chosen by their designated captain and then we get to the bottom of the barrel, so to speak, and it becomes about choosing between the bad and the worst.

Not being athletic, I was usually one of the bottom-of-the-barrel kids left for the athletic captains to settle for.  Secretly I would always hope to be chosen by the one who had the best team that was already formed because if I had so and so on my team, how could I lose?

In the game of life, there’s two teams:  God’s team and the devil’s team.

Only in this game, God gets to do the choosing and His team is stacked.  He chooses us all.  But He realizes that slowly people decide to leave His team and wander over to the losing team.  Why would anyone ever do that?  Why would someone want to be on the losing team?

Is it because what they are doing and saying and watching and drinking looks like more fun than team God?  Of course it is.  But when you know that you win in the end, why would you choose to follow the team of destruction?  Life gets rough and valleys are low but that’s life no matter what team you are on.  Why would you not want to be with the Captain who can lead you through the ugly days and usher you into the good days?

“It’s just a little fictional analogy of a PE class and real life,” you say.  And maybe so.  But every decision we make to go our own way or the world’s way is just as if we say to God, “I don’t want to be on your team anymore.”

We are lucky that when we sincerely apologize, (and we have to do it every single day), God says, “come on back over, my child.  I still want you on my team.”

Thankfully, God loves us no matter how many times we head over to the devil’s side.  And He is waiting across the field with arms open wide begging us to come back.  We have to be careful not to go back and forth too many times because one day, we may decide the immediate fun of team devil outweighs eternal life in heaven.

If God is for us, who can be against us.  Romans 8:31

It may get tough but as our Leader, He stays with us through it all, holding our hand, picking us up and carrying us, waiting patiently while we rest.  Wow!  Why would anyone not want to be on God’s team?  Your choice.  I beg you….choose the winning team.